Apparent crime wave hits city, worthless blogs suffer

Apparently, everyone in Guernsey County has decided to get themselves arrested and placed on probation today. This is cutting into my blogging time and I'm forced to actually do the job I'm getting paid for. Poppycock.

Given the current state of justice dispersement, this may be the only entry of the day. Pay attention.

Fidel Castro's brother is currently in charge of Cuba . I expect a line of tape to be stretched down the middle of Havana to create the illusion of separate rooms. Castro reportedly instructed him to "not mess with my stuff."

Matt Drudge has BROKEN OUT THE FUCKING SIREN! Apparently Mel Gibson has apoligized to the Jewish community. Personally, I'm not satisfied. I demand him to wear a yamucah, play dradel with Adam Sandler and spend a day in a stuffy room with Woody Allen...while eating nothing but motzah. Gibson's Holocaust documentary has been placed on the back burner. Something about losing credibility. Wasn't even aware that was necessary to make a movie.

In lieu of my actually having to do work, I urge you to read my good friend Corey Spring. He actually knows what he's doing, it's a huge difference. Corey, you can thank me for anywhere from 0 to 3 new readers. Gifts won't be necessary.

Fidel Castro Delegates Functions for Health Reasons (Prensa Latina)
ABC Pulls Plug On Gibson Project About Holocaust (ABC News)
Livin' in Cowtown (U Weekly)